Chuck Klosterman

Reading Chuck Klosterman isn’t good for you. Neither are his favorite subjects—cover bands, chicken McNuggets, and exgirlfriends. As part of The Current’s Fakebook series, Klosterman reads from his fourth book, Chuck Klosterman IV, a compilation of his journalism culled from Fargo’s Forum newspaper, Spin, GQ, and other pubs. 

Klosterman on . . .

Axl Rose: “If the thoughts of the redneck intellectual only gravitate along one linear path, Rose resided on that path’s most cognitive extreme. Rose was hard rock’s equivalent to U2’s Bono.” 

The difference between a nemesis and an archenemy: “You kind of like your nemesis, despite the fact that you despise him. You will always have drinks with your nemesis. However, you would never choose to have a cocktail with your archenemy, unless you were attempting to spike the gin with arsenic.”

The Real World: “I tend to consider myself a Real World scholar . . . because I’ve stopped watching the show as entertainment. At this point, I only watch it in hopes of unlocking the questions that have haunted man since the dawn of civilization.”

Soccer: “To say you love soccer is to say you believe in enforced equality more than you believe in the value of competition and the capacity of the human spirit. I would sooner have my kid deal crystal meth than play soccer.”

Vikings fans: “I have always liked the Packers, but mostly because I grew up surrounded by hordes of Viking fans, virtually all of whom I despise. No Packer victory has ever made me as happy as the Vikings’ loss to the Falcons in the 1998 NFC championship game; that was among the greatest days of my life.”

Feb. 23. Fitzgerald Theater, 10 E. Exchange St., St. Paul, 651-290-1221