Far Away Weddings

When they got engaged in April 2007, Jill and Cory Zafke knew they wanted a destination wedding. They researched their options online, choosing Paradisus Riviera Cancun on the Riviera Maya in Mexico. Jill Zafke worked closely with the resort’s seasoned wedding planner to coordinate the ceremony, floral arrangements, and postnuptial details. Surrounded by thirty guests, the Zafkes exchanged vows on February 22, 2008, on a sun-kissed beach, just as they had envisioned. “We wanted our wedding to be more intimate and to have our closest friends and family there,” Jill Zafke says. “We’re not big planners, so a destination wedding was the right move for us.”

Thinking about making the leap yourself? Here’s some advice for planning your perfect day, whether it be 200 or 2,000 miles away from home.

Pick Your Paradise

Photo by Arien Sherman

A destination wedding appeals to brides and grooms for a variety of reasons. “So many people have busy lives,” says Michele Keeley, a destination weddings specialist with Travel Leaders in Eden Prairie. “One of the reasons couples choose a destination wedding is not just the location, but they don’t have to spend a tremendous amount of time on it. A destination wedding really takes a lot of that pressure off their shoulders.”

Though a destination typically takes less time (and less money) to plan than a traditional wedding, couples should do their homework up-front to ensure the ideal experience.

The first step, of course, is selecting the destination. Travel consultants recommend locking in a date ten to twelve months out to get the best pricing and availability on lodging and airfare. Make sure your preferred wedding date at your location does not coincide with the rainy or hurricane season, Keeley advises.

Many popular wedding destinations have residency requirements, says Carol Flanigan, a destination wedding and honeymoon specialist for Carrousel Travel American Express in Richfield. “Residency requirements vary from none in Grand Cayman and Barbados to a month in Tahiti,” she notes. Other common destinations with shorter requirements include Jamaica (twenty-four hours) and Mexico (two days).

Mexico, one of the most popular wedding locales for Minnesota brides and grooms, imposes a few other conditions. For starters, many weddings are performed in Spanish, then translated into English. The Mexican government also requires a prenuptial blood test. “If couples choose not to have a blood test but they still want to have a Mexico wedding, I tell them to go to the justice of the peace here and have a symbolic wedding there,” Flanigan says. “It takes care of a lot of the legalities.”

The Zafkes chose this route. “We were officially married by my pastor the day before we left,” Jill Zafke says. “Our parents, grandparents, and immediate family attended. It was especially nice for our grandparents, who weren’t able to come to Mexico. The ceremony made them feel a part of the wedding.”

Hot Spots When planning a destination wedding, the world is your oyster. The most popular locales for Minnesota couples are Mexico, Jamaica, and Hawaii. Here are some other destinations, near and far, that local couples love: + Northern Minnesota and Wisconsin. Minnesota’s North Shore, particularly the stretch between Duluth and Grand Marais, appeals to Twin Cities brides and grooms because of its unique lakefront beauty and sense of seclusion. + The mountains. Minneapolis photographer Brady Willette has seen firsthand the appeal of mountain weddings, after photographing nuptials in 2008 in Vail and Breckenridge, Colorado, as well as Lake Tahoe’s Squaw Valley. + Cruises. While you can rarely get married on the ship because of legalities, “St. Thomas, Grand Cayman, and Barbados are easy places to exchange vows because they don’t have residency requirements,” says Carol Flanigan of Carrousel Travel. She also recommends European cruises, which offer an excellent value in the current economy. + Unique European locales. An Irish castle, a Tuscan villa, and the Greek Islands are among the unique locales where couples tie the knot. + Central America. Costa Rica and Belize woo brides and grooms looking for unique landscapes and personality.

Lost in Translation?
Once couples have decided upon the location, the next order of business is choosing the wedding site. For those marrying in popular places such as the Riviera Maya or Caribbean, resorts offer on-site planners and a variety of wedding packages and services. Keep in mind, however, the potential challenges of working with someone thousands of miles away. Gerilyn Giel, a Wayzata-based event planner, orchestrated a wedding in 2007 at the exclusive One&Only Palmilla resort in San Jose del Cabo, Mexico, for her clients, Emily McNamara and Ryan Oberlander. “Even though all the people at the resort spoke beautiful English, things can get lost in translation,” Giel says. But she found a simple way around the language barrier: “We relied heavily on e-mailing photographs, so this vendor could get a good visual of exactly what we were looking for.”

Some couples find that wedding planners outside the U. S. move at a slower pace. Keeley’s advice: Be patient. “A dedicated wedding planner at a resort will come in once a day to check e-mails, so there can be a bit of a lag,” she says. “I recommend that brides gather up a list of questions for the on-site wedding coordinator, instead of e-mailing them randomly. They’re more likely to get a response.”

For destinations that don’t offer on-site wedding services, consider hiring an independent planner. Katie Dohman thoroughly researched options online for her May 2008 wedding on the island of Maui. “But my fiancé [William] and I ultimately decided to go with a planner because we wanted to work with someone there who knew the vendors and could help guide us through the details, rather than trying to do it all on our own,” says the St. Paul resident. (To hire a qualified planning company, Dohman recommends checking with the Better Business Bureau and reviewing ratings from other clients.)

16 percent of American couples choose a destination wedding, up 400 percent in the last decade. —CNN.com

Feels Like Home

Photo by Brady Willette

Of course, a destination wedding needn’t be thousands of miles from home to feel a world away. Becky and Joe Pitzl of St. Paul chose to marry in the resort town of Glenwood, northwest of the Twin Cities, near Alexandria. “Ever since Joe and I started dating, we have gone there many times,” says Becky Pitzl, whose parents own a cabin on Lake Minnewaska. “We looked around at some venues in Minneapolis, but we couldn’t find the right feel. A wedding on the lake felt the best.”

Pitzl used local vendors in most instances, but chose to bring her own photographer, Brady Willette. A family friend and neighbor, Willette is no stranger to the destination wedding. In addition to the Pitzl wedding in September 2008, he photographed four other weddings outside Minnesota. “What it boils down to for couples is the comfort factor,” Willette says. “As a photographer, you’re invited into the most intimate day in these people’s lives. If we both live in the Twin Cities, I can spend time with the couple, meet with them in their homes, and get a sense of their style, their colors.”

Next Step: Guest List

A destination wedding for most couples means an intimate experience with close family and friends. Stay sensitive to your guests’ needs, such as budget, without compromising your own desires for your big day.

During the planning process, couples should apprise guests of all the wedding details, from travel arrangements to activities upon arrival. Three useful tools in communicating with guests are the save-the-date card, the invitation, and a personalized wedding website. An itinerary of the days leading up to the wedding and the celebration itself, complete with dress code, can also prove useful.

In the end, a destination wedding is designed to take the pressure off planning traditional nuptials—and to create the intimate experience you’ve wanted from the very beginning. Becky Pitzl echoes the sentiments of many brides who have married away from home: “All I ever wanted was for everyone to enjoy themselves, and they did,” she says. “Everyone had the same agenda, which was to have a relaxing, fun, and happy time.”

Celebrating At Home
Many couples who marry away from home have found the perfect formula: Invite a small group of friends and family to the nuptials, and plan a more inclusive, casual celebration back home.

Three weeks after they exchanged vows in Hawaii, Katie and William Dohman hosted a backyard reception at Katie’s sister’s home. “We invited 130 people and had heavy hors d’oeuvres and a rum bar to make mai tais,” says Katie, who rented a tent and dance floor for the occasion. “We loaded up the iPod and had a dance.”

Jill and Cory Zafke followed their February 2008 wedding in Mexico with a backyard barbecue in June at Cory’s parents’ home on White Bear Lake. To add some fun, the Zafkes rented a photo booth for guests to take pictures of themselves. The couple provided scrapbooking tools, and reception attendees decorated pages in the newlyweds’ guest book.

Also consider incorporating themes from your destination wedding into the reception. For example, if you were married in Las Vegas, set up a casino-themed party back home. Or offer leis to party guests to honor your Hawaii wedding.